RISKY BUSINESS

I have been known to be a pretty open person about things going on in my life. My close friends know alot about me. I do not hide alot from the people who I work with. Sometimes, to a fault, I offer personal information about myself. It is risky to be open about one's life. Just like art, the risk of communication is critique, AND misinterpretation. Anytime a person chooses to share their story, it is going to be perceived and translated by the programming in the receiving person's mind.

People draw more defined opinions and pictures of a person when they have more information such as how much money that person makes, what their financial situation is, what they believe politically and spiritually, or what is happening in their personal life with relationships & sex.

I want people to know me.

One of the purposes of the "Winchell World" blog is simply to be an outlet for this communication. Therefore, I want to post some things about what I do; what is going on in my life, and who I am. This definitely will be a work in progress and will not be held by just one post. But, I am going to give it a shot.

As a preface, I come from a family that has the communication skills a rock. It's not obvious on the surface, and if asked, many of my family members would perhaps diagree. That's fine. But the fact is we are horrible at not just communicating, but we are not open about what is going on. Most families are like this. It is not uncommon by any means.

I have a deep admiration and respect for my brother in California. He has faced incredible challenges over the past year, and through the process has been very open, clear and communicative about what's going on with him. That is a great beacon of hope for those of us who possess some of the thought processes that I am attempting to reflect in this post. It is also a deviation from our familial norm.

Throughout life, the line of action my brother has taken, has not necessarily been the case with most of my family, including myself. Whether it's money, health, or God, someone could have the Feds on their tail because of tax problems, a very discernable diagnosis of a disease, or perhaps a spiritual challenge and you would never know it. I don't know why this is. Perhaps fear, just not wanting to share, or whatever. But where it has lead is to separation, assumptions and basically everyone living their own life.

In my family, it is typical to hear things like, "The Doctor's aren't sure what it is," "We're not doing to well," "Well, we just really don't have the money," or my favorite, "Where are you going to church?" "Can you believe so and so got such and such car!," "How can they afford that?," etc, etc, etc..........

If you have gotten this far, perhaps you can tell that this type of environment can be frustrating for a person like me. Alot of the times, over the years, the communication line in our family has simply been as if the meteorologist on the ten o'clock news came out and said, "Well, tomorrow, we are going to have some weather."

Maybe other members of my family feel the same way I do. Maybe they don't. How would I know? Honestly, except for my brothers here in Tennessee and in California, the conversations don't go that deep.

To me, I believe people should know about family member's situations. I really don't want someone to die, and then find out a bunch of stuff that wasn't in order, that easily could have been taken care of. And, I don't want to die and leave someone in my family a mess.

Maybe a good place to start is to tell people openly about myself. And, following, I'm going to do that. Risky? Yes. But, so what? I'm going to put the following in a sort of personal interview form with questions and answers about my life. Here we go:

1) What do you do? I manage a local sales team for Clear Channel Radio in Nashville, TN. I am going into my fourth year with the company. When I came to Clear Channel, it signaled a drastic career change leaving the confines of the Christian industrial complex, where I experienced 15 years of tumultuous and average success.

It has been the best move I have ever made. I make a modest income (not quite 6 figures yet) in a middle-market, managing a team of 6 direct salespeople with the help of two other combination sellers. The radio station I represent is currently the #1 overall radio station in Nashville. I am blessed, fortunate and happy with my vocation and the continued prospects that develop every day.

2) What is your personal situation? I am single with a nine year old daughter, Sophia, who lives in Memphis. I rent a small, nice apartment in Williamson County, TN which is a suburb just south of metro-Nashville.

3) Are you rich? No. Much of the past year and half of my life has been spent wrapping my mind and intention around just how few skills I was raised with to build a prosperous life. Some families have alcoholism that runs rampant through the bloodlines. Other families have disease. Our family has poor money management skills masked in some twisted form of lying denial that presents a front that the opposite is true. It's not. Fortunately, a person can get on the right track. Thanks to a very great example I have in my best friend, my own slap in the face into reality, and Dave Ramsey, I am slowly, and not without problems, heading in a better direction that will allow myself to live the life I want to live, go to the places I want to go, not be dependent on anyone, and help provide my daughter a decent future.

4) How are you health-wise? I attempt to take care of myself, eat healthy and exercise. I have regular physicals and feel much better when I am taking care of myself. The biggest realization came in late 2004 when I was diagnosed with ADD. This benchmarked much of the revolutionary change in direction of my life, and really woke me up to some of these other issues that CAN be explained, AND dealt with.

I am not an alcoholic. My physical and mental makeup can make alcohol a problem. When I begin to drink, and put myself in environments where my mind cannot focus, I will lose control and not be able to turn the booze off. Fortunately, realizing this, helps avoid it. ADD is a hereditary condition. It is not an excuse. I almost get pissed that it took the fifth child in a line of men to figure out that this may have something to do with our dysfunctional communication and management skills as a family.

5) The ultimate question: Where do you go to church? I don't. You can get a clue as to why by reading some of my other posts on the blog. The truth needs no defense, only lies do. Therefore I will just leave this subject to that.

6) What do you do in your spare time? I enjoy music, sports, and just life itself. I love being around people, and yet I like my private time. I read alot. Therefore, I try to exercise and workout several times a week. I listen to alot of music and read books, mostly related to spirituality (NO, I've never read, "Purpose Driven Life." Sorry), poetry, biography, the mind and marketing.

I love women.

I love the Miami Dolphins, Memphis Grizzlies and Kansas City Royals. I follow each of these teams on an average fan level throughout their respective seasons.

7) What are your thoughts on parenthood? Bad question. I love my child. My time is limited with her. Nothing can make me love my child more, or less. That bond is unshakeable in my eyes. It is important to me that as to the influence I have on her, that I am a rock, a solid environment where she does not feel the need to act in a way that is not herself. It is important that I put an environment around her where she develops the habit of being able to make good decisions based on who she is, not what some made up domestication policy says she should be. I very rarely get angry with my daughter. It's useless. Kindness, patience, peace, care. These are the things that I can offer, this is the only way. I enjoy every moment with my daughter and I don't care what anyone else says or thinks about it.

I've spent my entire life following a so-called "Christian" paradigm that wrecks families, destroys lives and mangles the futures of children by teaching them to be anyone other than themselves. I am not going to go there any more. That's not saying I know the future of my child, but it does say that I'm not going to waste today to try to avoid a future that doesn't exist except in my fearful mind.

8) Sounds like you hate God? Nope. Not at all. I hate the closedmindedness and numbness of the christian industrial and distribution complex. If there really is a literal hell, these complexes will represent Boardwalk and Park Place on Hell's Monopoly board. That real estate is too expensive for me. It will cost my soul, and I can't afford that. It's bad stewardship of what God has provided me freely.

Well, there is a good start. Perhaps more RISKY BUSINESS later. For now, I am going to listen to one of the three most sexy women in music: Sade.

Good Night!